I’ve realised that I’ve not posted a #toddlerlife post since November, and my nephew has certainly said A LOT since then. The majority of my conversations with him are either via phone or FaceTime as I live three hours away.
*Gets in bath with Grandad and wees*
Grandad – Oi, it’s a bath not a piss pot
KP – PISS POT. PISS POT. PISS POT.
Me – What you doing?
KP – Food for my mouth.
Mum – Quick Kaine, I need a weeKP – Get your gary out and go in the bushes, Nanny.*Gary is what he calls his widge
KP – My not leaving Sarah, my looking after her.
KP – My making you something
Me – What’re you making?
KP – Butter.
KP – My not go to Scotland again, it shut.
Me – Guess what I had last night? Salted caramel cheesecakeKP – Aww my love thatMe – You’ve never had itKP – So?
KP – Why you naked?Me – I’m not, I’m wearing a towelKP – Why you naked?
Me – Love you, bud. Bye
KP – Love you, bye
Me – Bye monkeyKP – Bye monkey
KP – Hello, my naked
Me – Why’re you naked?
KP – Putting my jarmies on. You naked?Me – No mate.
KP – You cut your beard?
Ian – Yes
KP – You cut your hair?
Ian – No, don’t you like my hair?
KP – No, get the hairdressers
KP – Ian, what you doing?Ian – The washingKP – What for?
Ian – It needs washing
KP – You dirty?
Ian – No, the clothes are
KP – Tell her I’ll speak in one sec
Me – Has it been one sec yet?
KP – No, one big sec.
KP – You got me a present?
Me – No, would you like a present?
KP – No thanks.
Me – Can I have a biscuit please?
KP – No
Me – Why?
KP – It’s only for big boys and you is too little.
KP – My ring you on my own
Me – Did you? You’re so clever, what’s my phone number?
KP – 4.
KP – What you doing?
Me – Just sat in bed
KP – You get up right now.
Mum – I love you very much, KaineKP – I love you very carefully, Nan.
KP – Sarah, you got your tattoo on?Me – Yes, I have them all on, bud.
KP – Me making a coffee and reading my letterMe – Ah, two things you can’t doKP – My can, my Spider-Man.
KP – Sarah, me having a wee on my potty. You watch it.
KP – Sarah, you got a gary?
Me – No
KP – Ian got a gary?Me – YesKP – Why you not got a gary?Me – Because I’m a girlKP – Girl’s not have gary’s?Mum – Girls have flowersMe – Oh, bloody hell.
KP – What’s that?
Me – My purse
KP – My have some money please?
Me – *gives him 20p*
KP – My need more for my mates
KP – My going to drive a monster truck and you go in the boot
Me – You can’t drive
KP – My can drive actually
KP – What’s that?
Me – A Toblerone
KP – Aww my love bo-bub-bone.
He’s the absolute best and always makes me smile.